Sex Positive Therapy
💗 Sex-Positive Therapy in Santa Barbara
A Safe, Compassionate Space for Sexuality, Desire, and Authenticity
Sexuality is a natural and meaningful part of being human — yet for many, it’s surrounded by shame, silence, or fear of judgment. Whether you’re exploring intimacy, recovering from sexual shame, or deepening connection in your relationships, you deserve a therapeutic space that honors all of who you are.
In my practice, sex-positive therapy means creating a safe, affirming, and inclusive environment where your experiences, desires, and identities are respected and understood — not pathologized.
I offer sex-positive therapy in Santa Barbara for individuals, couples, and polycules who want to explore connection, intimacy, and pleasure through the lens of emotional health, self-acceptance, and relational integrity.
What Is Sex-Positive Therapy?
Sex-positive therapy is grounded in the belief that sexuality, in all its diversity, is a healthy part of life. It rejects shame and judgment and instead focuses on consent, authenticity, and emotional well-being.
In this approach, we recognize that sexual expression can take many forms — monogamous or polyamorous, vanilla or kinky, fluid or fixed — and that your experience of desire and connection is unique to you.
Sex-positive therapy offers a place to:
Heal from shame or negative sexual conditioning
Explore identity and orientation safely and openly
Discuss intimacy, connection, and desire with confidence
Navigate differences in sexual needs or interests with partners
Process trauma, body image, or relationship patterns
Reconnect with pleasure and embodiment after disconnection or pain
You don’t need to fit any specific box to belong here. This is therapy that welcomes curiosity, honors diversity, and supports you in finding freedom and comfort in your own skin.
My Approach
My work as a sex-positive, trauma-informed therapist integrates Humanistic and Person-Centered Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), and Somatic and Relational approaches to help clients deepen emotional safety and embodiment.
Humanistic and Person-Centered Foundation
You are the expert on your own experience. My role is to offer empathy, understanding, and a safe, judgment-free space where your story can unfold naturally.
Together, we explore how your sexual self intersects with your emotional life, relationships, and sense of identity — and how healing and growth can emerge through self-acceptance.
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
EFT helps individuals and couples understand the attachment needs that underlie intimacy and desire.
Whether you’re navigating disconnection, shame, or differences in sexual expression, EFT helps you communicate your needs with clarity and compassion.
This approach deepens trust and connection — essential foundations for fulfilling sexual and emotional intimacy.
Somatic Awareness
Sexuality is experienced through the body. Somatic therapy helps you reconnect with sensations, pleasure, and presence.
We work on grounding, breath, and mindful awareness to restore comfort, curiosity, and safety within your own body.
This is especially healing for those who’ve experienced trauma, dissociation, or discomfort with bodily expression.
Trauma-Informed Practice
Many clients come to therapy carrying experiences of shame, coercion, or trauma that have shaped their relationship to sexuality.
My trauma-informed approach ensures that every step of exploration happens with safety, consent, and control.
Healing happens at your pace — with compassion and care.
Sex-Positivity in Practice
Sex-positivity is more than an idea — it’s a stance of respect and curiosity toward all forms of consensual sexuality and relationship.
In practice, this means:
No judgment: Your desires, preferences, and relationships are valid.
Consent-centered: Emotional and physical safety are foundational.
Inclusive language: Therapy that honors all genders, orientations, and identities.
Curiosity over shame: We explore with openness, not pathologizing.
Empowerment: You define what healthy, fulfilling sexuality means for you.
Whether you’re exploring new aspects of your sexuality or healing from past experiences, this is a place to connect with authenticity and integrity.
Working with Couples and Partners
Sex and intimacy are deeply tied to emotional connection. For couples or poly partners, sex-positive therapy provides a space to explore pleasure, vulnerability, and communication without fear or judgment.
Using Gottman Method and Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT-C) principles, I help partners:
Reconnect emotionally and physically after disconnection
Navigate mismatched desires or changing needs
Communicate about fantasies, limits, or fears
Explore non-monogamy, polyamory, or open relationships
Integrate kink or BDSM into healthy dynamics
Heal from betrayal or relational ruptures
Together, we build emotional safety — the foundation for erotic and relational connection.
Healing from Sexual Shame
Sexual shame can take root early, often through cultural or religious messages that frame sexuality as something to hide or fear. These messages can lead to guilt, anxiety, or difficulty connecting with one’s own desire.
Therapy offers a chance to rewrite that story.
Through gentle exploration, mindfulness, and self-compassion, you can begin to release internalized shame and reclaim a sense of worthiness and wholeness.
Healing doesn’t mean changing who you are — it means allowing yourself to be who you are, fully and without apology.
Sex-Positive Therapy for Individuals
For individuals, sex-positive therapy can help you:
Understand your sexual identity and preferences
Explore desire, fantasy, and attraction safely
Address performance anxiety or fear of vulnerability
Rebuild self-esteem and body trust
Process trauma or past experiences that impact intimacy
Develop confidence in communicating your needs
This is a place for curiosity, discovery, and integration — a space where sexuality can be a source of connection, not shame.
For Poly, Kinky, or Nontraditional Relationships
Many clients I work with practice or are curious about polyamory, ethical non-monogamy, or kink. These experiences often require nuanced emotional and relational skills that traditional therapy models overlook.
In our work, we emphasize consent, communication, and emotional safety as the foundation for exploration.
You’ll never be judged for who or how you love — the goal is to support authenticity, integrity, and connection.
A Therapy Space That Honors All of You
You don’t have to separate your sexuality from your emotional life, your relationships, or your healing.
In this practice, every part of you — your love, your body, your desires, your story — is welcome.
My role is to offer compassion, clarity, and curiosity as you explore what sexual authenticity means for you.
Therapy is not about fixing who you are; it’s about helping you come home to yourself.
Ready to Begin?
If you’re seeking sex-positive therapy in Santa Barbara, I would be honored to walk alongside you. Together, we’ll create a space of understanding, safety, and growth — where you can explore your full self with confidence and care.
Reach out today to schedule a consultation. You deserve to feel safe, whole, and alive in your body and relationships.